As most of you know, we took Abi and Aiden out of public school and began homeschooling last September.  It has been a very rewarding decision for us, but it has been accompanied with many challenges.  Financially, it just isn't easy.  Far from it, to be honest.  As a wife, it is challenging because I have little time alone with my husband now.  As a woman, it is challenging because I now have my kids 24/7, leaving me no time to do what I used to be able to do in our house (who knew homeschooling would create such mess!?) or as an individual, such as lunches with friends.

Lately, one challenge has been brought up many times.  This challenge is less mine, though.  After leaving school, Abigail thought that her friendships would continue.  In a world of social media, people can esily stay (somewhat) connected.  Abi got an Instagram account this past Spring and has enjoyed posting pictures she has taken, especially when the subject of the photograph is somehow linked to the books she treasures so dearly.  Instantly, she got quite a few followers from her previous school.  As time has gone on, though, she has realized that many of these kids do not "like" her photos, or return messages to her.  When we go to their old school twice a week for Aiden's communication therapy, her heart is hurt as former friends walk past her and do not even smile at her when she is saying "hi" to them.

Naturally, Abi has sought advice from me because I am her mother. (What a humbling experience it is to guide youth in the ways of hurt feelings and emotional growth!) I had to admit to her that I was not an expert at all on the subject.  Like her, when I graduated high school and moved away from FL, I lost the majority of whom I had considered close friends.  On Facebook, I comment on statuses and pictures, I make an effort to stay connected, but there is no reply.  It is painful to see your comments be the only ones to which there is no response when you can see the responses to the rest - especially when you had considered the person your best friend.  So, as someone who did not have wisdom in this area, I did the only thing I could - I prayed.  A lot. For weeks.

Today, I got a call from my mom.  She was dealing with hurt feelings over something similar.  She said, "Why is it that you and I are the ones so many come to when they need something, but we are shunned during times of joy?"  I didn't really have an answer.  I did, however, remember what my mom had told me so many times that my Grandma Swisher told her, "Jesus wants us to turn the other cheek, but He never intended for us to be a doormat." Wow.  Grand slam, Grandma S! It is not an easy, black-and-white thing to figure out.  Sometimes, we turn our other cheek; other times we say "no" firmly.

Abi and I had a talk about her Instagram and "friend" issues.  I told her that she and I (and Nana) need to figure out what people in our lives hurt us to the point that we no longer have confidence in the gifts God gave us.  If we are less of whom God created us to be because we are left feeling inadequate or not good enough after something done or not done by another, then we need to respectfully remove ourselves from that relationship.  So, she sat down and figured out which relationships have been the most damaging to her confidence and blocked them from her Instagram account.  (Now I need to follow her lead on my Facebook account!)  We agreed that she should still be kind and say "hi" to those who ignore her, but she doesn't have to accept that she is unworthy of a response.

God has given gifts to every person.  We all need to be in relationship with people who help us to grow those gifts and use them to His glory.