One reason I wanted to write about Aiden is that I wanted to show you what a great boy he is. So many people seem to overlook him. Abigail has believed she's been on stage since birth, so she tends to command attention with her own essence. Quite a few family members even pass him by. I am the type of mom who does not focus on gift-giving. A two or three gifts for a birthday is plenty. It is more about celebrating the blessing of the gift of that child's life than it is about showering them with unneeded toys. On January 7th this year, as in the past 4 years, Aiden received his three gifts from us, a few from Nana, a book from Aunt Karen, summer clothes from Mamaw, and that was that. I am completely fine with that. The one thing that isn't ok is that many other family members do not do that for Abby. They send multiple gifts and spoil her year-round. I am not saying I want more for Aiden, I just hate that my children are not treated equally. It truly breaks my heart that he receives so much less, not just in materials, but in overall affection. Honestly, I wish they would do less for Abby and equal it out in that manner! I cannot, for the life of me, understand how anyone could love one child more than another. I could never choose between my kids. I love them individually, but equally, and I pray every day that others will do the same.
Another reason I am writing about Aiden is that I want to share with you our struggles and blessings that have been happening in the past 6 months or so. Since Aiden was about 18 months old, I knew there was something a bit different about his way of learning. His speech was a little bit behind, his understanding of concepts was significantly behind, but his visual-oral learning was way ahead. I pushed and pushed the doctors to give me some answers as to why he didn't understand some simple concepts and finally, last July, they agreed to let me have him evaluated by the school system. In August 2008, Aiden was routinely evaluated and "diagnosed" with Sensory Integration Dysfunction. It is one of the many parts of what makes Autism. No, he is not Autistic, but he does have a few of the symptoms of it. Part of Aiden's SID has caused delayed speech, anxiety, delayed behavioral concepts, and auditory processing deficiency. SID is was explained to me like this: All 5 of his senses are like having 5 people scream at you for attention at the same time. It is overwhelming and you do not know which one to answer. When we are at places like WalMart, Aiden is very overwhelmed with the physical contact of people brushing by him, the constant sounds and loud abrupt noises, the vast array of visual stimuli...it has led to many tantrums that people just don't seem to understand. Honestly, I have a hard time when people tell me that he is "obviously not disciplined" because it is not a matter of discipline, it is a matter of him being able to learn how to control those times of anxiety. I read a great book, The Out of Sync Child, that has helped me to work with him all day every day at home. Aiden also goes to speech therapy twice a week to help him to not only speak better, but to understand concepts and to process information auditorily. He has improved significantly in the past 6 months. Many times, such as at big family gatherings, when he feels his anxiety building, he will ask me to bring him to the car or another room for a "time out". No tantrums...hurray! He is able, for the most part, to have simple conversations now. Instead of sitting in the corner with his hands on his ears when another child colors on his paper in nursery, he will go to the nursery worker and tell them that the other child "made him anjry (still can't make a g sound) by coloring his paper". Big progress. He knows all of his letters, capital and lower case, 31 sight words, and all of his numbers up to 100...way above average, so we know he will need good visual aids in school!
Some of you know that he has had a difficult time growing in the past. Between his first and second birthdays, he only grew 1/8 inch in length instead of the average 3-5 inches. We have gone every 3 months since for growth checks and I am pleased to let you know that he is now on the curve! Barely, but still on it. He is now four years old, 37 1/2 inches tall, 35 pounds. He looks skinny, but is up there on his weight for his height, believe it or not. Aiden is wearing 3T pants, 3 and 4T shirts, and size 9 shoes. He is definitely smaller than most 4 year old boys, but is finally outgrowing some of his "toddler-look".
Aiden loves his sister more than anybody on this planet. His world seems to revolve around her, to the point that he will even let her put a dress, lipstick, and tiara on him so they can play "princess". When Abigail is at school, and when we are not busy with therapy, he mostly plays with his cars, trains, planes, helicopters, etc. If it has wheels and an engine, it has hhis attention. He is especially fascinated with vehicles that have sirens. About a year ago, he was playing with a toy police car, saying, "Ruff ruff...Nein! Ruff ruff...Nein!" It took me a minute to figure out what was going on. He was being Daddy...he believed every patrol car had a dog in it that barked and every officer drove around saying, "Nein!" to get his dog to stop barking! His favorite TV shows are Curious George, Barney, The Backyardigans, Sid the Science Kid, and SuperWhy. He loves, loves music and was thrilled to get a real keyboard for his birthday. His favorite movies are Cars and Alvin and the Chipmunks (the "real people" one).
Each day, I pray that my little boy will grow to be faithful to God, first and foremost, and that God will grant me the wisdom to be the parent he needs me to be for him. If you would like to pray for Aiden, those are my requests. Thank you!